As I write this, I have no idea what the next few days will bring, especially considering the profanity-laden post made by the president over the weekend, plus the one Tuesday promising “a whole civilization will die tonight.”

No one ever said he was a diplomat … except maybe him and those who kowtow to him.

But anger, threats and retribution are not what I want to talk about today (assuming we’re still here Wednesday), especially when just a week ago I was asking people to perform random acts of kindness. And as one of my frequent anonymous critics/trolls noted on the newspaper’s website last week, “The kindest thing a person can do that’s 100 percent free is simply smile. Smile at the grocery checker, the fast-food drive-through worker, the driver in the car next to you … just smile at complete strangers. Being kind is easy. As Nike would say, just do it.”

While we agree on little, especially regarding the worth of Internet trolls, on this we are in sync. It may sound simplistic, but he’s right, and smiles are powerful tools.

Not all of us smile easily, whether it’s being self-conscious about one’s smile (as I was from fourth grade when a “friend” criticized my wide smile in a class picture to years in pain because of genetically bad teeth before finally getting new teeth and a new smile), depression and anxiety (again, me), deep-seated anger, or many other things that make it hard to consider slapping on a grin. For some of us, Nat King Cole’s “Smile,” though absolutely beautiful, feels like we’re being told to grin and bear whatever pain we’re given (which is part of being human).

The idea that a smile can make you feel better has been around at least since Charles Darwin, according to a 2019 NPR report, but scientists have determined that the effect is minimal.

But remember that thing about any step forward being progress? Even a small positive effect is good, c’mon. It adds up!

Sure, a fake smile or a smirk is definitely not going to be very cheery. But a genuine smile (also known as a Duchenne smile), one that involves your whole face rather than just your mouth, releases endorphins, lowers blood pressure and boosts the immune system. Best of all, it’s contagious. Sure, scientists are now casting doubt on the idea that a Duchenne smile can’t be faked, but I have my doubts about that.

Just try to keep a glowering expression when you see a baby smile or hear them laugh. It doesn’t really work for most of us, especially those of us who feel compelled to make funny faces at the baby just to hear that laugh. Except maybe for the people who are dedicated to being wet blankets.

Sam Goldstein, Ph.D., wrote on Psychology Today in January 2025, “Even newborns smile, though early grins are often reflexive. Between 6 and 8 weeks, infants develop a ‘social smile,’ intentionally directed at caregivers. Babies are naturally attuned to female voices and faces, and their smiles often prompt a dopamine release in their parents, elevating mood and strengthening bonds. Smiling is not just an emotional gesture but a biological one, activating the same brain regions in infants and adults that respond to happiness.”

I got a little bit of that dopamine hit from a video posted Sunday in a group chat of a friend’s grandchild laughing at a ball being dropped. If we could just bottle babies’ laughter …

Even though I’m not always so good on picking up social cues (sarcasm I get because that’s a big part of my personality, thanks, Mama), a smile is one of those things that I can hang my assumptions on, and I’m usually fairly good at divining the difference between real and fake smiles. A real smile that lights up the eyes tells me that person’s happiness is genuine, and warms me, making me feel far more apt to connect with them. One that is more of a mask (out of a sense of duty, or perhaps to put on a brave face when everything is falling apart) causes more wariness. If it’s a friend, I’ll probably sit and talk with them to make sure they’re OK and offer whatever support I can. If it’s a stranger, I’ll be polite, especially if they’re in retail or the service industries, because the last thing they might need is someone being a jackhole to them when they’re already having a bad day.

Smiling is hard sometimes, such as when you’re grieving, but I’ve found in my own life that it’s easier and healthier to at least attempt to smile and give in to feelings of happiness than to continue to wallow in anger and depression (and this is coming from someone with lifelong depression). I’m not saying fake it till you make it, but at least be open to letting some light in, even at the hard times. A smile won’t fix everything, but it can help your mood more than you think.

Hell, when I die, I want people laughing at my memorial service (I want to be cremated, so even though I love the idea, there will be no “Pop Goes the Weasel” played at my funeral; go with showtunes, please). Share stories of my weirdness, bad jokes, social anxiety, word obsession and more, and find the humor and joy where you can.

When I can’t find the joy in anything, I know something’s seriously wrong and that it’s time to seek help. I see so many people who seem to have little joy in their lives, even though they pretend they do, complete with a fake, often tense, smile on their faces.

Here’s a little secret: Some of us can definitely tell.

Without getting into politics, I can say that I place far more faith in those who smile from their hearts, can laugh at themselves, and don’t place emphasis on division. Why? Because I’m a human being who responds better to other people being human than someone tearing down others and stirring up anger (often while claiming to be soooooo happy).

Nowadays, unfortunately, that tends to be more heavily on one side of the aisle, with cruelty often being the point (not that there aren’t politicians across the spectrum who are guilty of such, but c’mon, seriously). Considering I came of age under bipartisan icons like Dale Bumpers, John Paul Hammerschmidt and others who smiled easily, were brilliant and advanced the art of reaching across the aisle, that saddens me.

But not quite as much as the fact that angry posts like those put out by the president (on Easter, no less) were probably cheered by his followers.

If only more of them practiced kindness instead of anger, perhaps they’d realize we’re all in this together and work toward good, and then they’d have something positive to smile about.